I had my baby girl just over three weeks ago and will share my story, which is long, probably too detailed and as honest as it can be. Because I’m the type of person that wants to know everything to feel as prepared as I can be. I loved reading all these stories as I felt like I learnt different ways my own daughter’s birth could go. I’d read up on everything I could beforehand and I think that helped me feel prepared. I had no plan, I had preferences. Nothing was ruled out, it was just in order of preference.

I’ll start off by saying that I am someone that was very paranoid that they would not know they were in early labour and had visions that that would mean I wouldn’t know to tell my other half to come home in enough time to be there for the birth. Every twinge from 37 weeks I was like “ooo is this it?!”

Due date was 7th July and on 5th I started having what I can only describe as discomfort low in my belly. I started losing my mucus plug that day and I was sure the discomfort was because of that. I’d read many stories about mucus plug not leading to immediate labour so I figured I had a week or so to go and I’ll admit (much to Midwife’s horror) I checked my cervix and it felt just 1cm but soft.

That evening/night the discomfort was still there. We had had sex for the first time in ages (my other half wasn’t into it at the late stages) but I’d convinced him to get over himself and help and girl out. About 1am we went for a walk, which wasn’t actually that uncommon as I’d had so many aches and pains in the pregnancy, walks had become my friend. Then we went to bed.

Next day (6th) other half went to work and the discomfort seemed to have subsided when I woke. Until the late afternoon when it came back. Again thoughts were “it’s not regular so it’s not labour”. I bounced on my ball while other half played Xbox. Again nothing new in my shitty, the achy pregnancy.

By evening I thought I’d try my tens machine. I was 39+6 and remembered the instructions said use any time from 37 weeks. Anything to ease the discomfort. Well boy did it. Wore it for the rest of the evening. Only thing I’d say is it felt like I got used to the intensity of the shocks, so every so often I’d have turn up the intensity. Little did I know that was because the contractions I was having were getting stronger and closer together.

I phoned the hospital about midnight but was frightened to because I did not want to be one of those that got turned away only being 1cm and feel like a drama queen. They said to come in. I gathered my stuff and told other half not to bother too much as we’d probably be home again in an hour but I just wanted to make sure.

Got to the hospital about 2am (7th July) and they checked me. Contractions were 3 mins apart and I was 6cm. WTF! “So we’re not going home then?!”

They whisked me off to the birth centre and ran the pool for me and I climbed in, which meant taking the tens machine off. I sat there for two hours before deciding to use the gas and air. I could have gone longer without using it but thought “if it’s there I don’t have to be a martyr, use it Emily!”.

Another two hours and they checked me again. I hadn’t progressed AT ALL! I was devastated. To have done so well by myself and then have it stop but still be in pain was so upsetting. They offered to break my waters and I jumped at the the chance to hurry things along. WHAT A MISTAKE. My body went into meltdown. The shock of the pain caused me to be constantly sick which meant coming out the pool and onto a bed, which was excruciating laying on my back. My friend said she could hear me screaming one end of the hospital to the other.

I had pethadin. I took whatever they offered. I was screaming like a banshee. The pain was indescribable. I kept saying “I can’t do this anymore” and remember dreading the next contraction because I felt like it would finish me off. The pethadin did nothing for the pain during contractions but in between I guess I did relax more before the next one.

I demanded an epidural which meant transferring to the hospital next door. I was 8cm when I got the first dose of epidural. After that the pains started to come back. The epidural pump was broken. Just my luck. Waited for anaesthetist to come back and fix it and find a new pump. I was 9cm now. Last Cm I got pain free full of epidural. It was quite blissful to have no pain for a while. They waited a couple more hours after I was 10cm for baby to be settled properly into birth canal and then time to push. I pushed for about an hour I think. Then they got the doctors in as baby was getting bit stressed.

About 10 doctors and nurses came in and said they needed to use a cup to help her out. Tbh I thought I’d be upset by this but I just waved them off and said “do what you’ve got to do”. The cup didn’t work so they came back to me and said they needed to use forceps. Again, thought I’d be upset but waved them off again and I was the one reassuring my other half who was in tears, rather than being the one in panic feeling like a failure. They used forceps and then decided to give me an episiotomy. Down and then to the side. Least favourite part of during birth and after, defo. Could hear them cutting my skin although it was numb. I know people don’t like interventions but at the end of the day it’s not about what I like or want. It was about making sure my baby made a safe arrival.

Anyway my baby girl finally made it into the world at 17:00 on 7th July weighing 8lb 3oz. She wasn’t a HUGE baby but she was 55cm long so no wonder she found it hard to get out! She was taken away and checked first because she had been stressed, which was hard. Hearing her first cry was a lovely moment. She was handed back to me while they stitched me up.

we bonded skin on skin and then I fed her while they delivered my placenta. After that it was time for other people to come and say hello to her.

She’s a very sleepy baby and I get quite a lot of sleep at night at the moment, which has been a god send as I let my body recover. The stitches were a bitch. My coccyx killed for two weeks. The constant period is annoying. The hormones are CRAZY. It’s cliche but I’d do it all again. And I am someone that hated every second of my pregnancy and labour wasn’t exactly pain free. I’d still do it all again, for her.