Cant get past the fear

lisa • Mom of 1 girl👧, 3 boys👦🧒🧒, twin 👧🧒( born 2/4/20) and one in heaven 👼 #nosanityleft

I had a miscarriage back in dec, now we are expecting twins. Im 11 weeks along. We already had one scare of bleeding, and this whole time i cant get past the fear of loosing them. I am buying things so prepared since its twins but its like i have to force myself to buy anything because im afraid its like jynixing myself. I have anxiety so my miscarriage didnt help. I want to be happy but so scared to... :(