No support 😔
I don’t really know how to put my thoughts into words but I just wanted to get stuff off my chest. Recently I’ve been having really bad depressive episodes; I think the cause is a lack of social life as I have zero friends (genuinely not a single person besides my boyfriend and family). But while I’ve been going through these episodes I just haven’t felt like I’ve been getting any support from my boyfriend. I spent 18 hours in bed today and all I did was cry and nap and I tried talking to my boyfriend but he rarely replied because he’s been busy playing video games. Then earlier my phone died and I decided to leave it and just try sleep the day away. But I got woken up because my boyfriend had contacted my flatmate (who I don’t get along with) and told her to tell me to stop ignoring him. Anyway while my phone was dead he had actually asked me if I wanted him over, but by the time I’d seen it after charging my phone it had been hours so I told him he should have just come anyway; and he said he was just about to leave now. But then, five minutes later he said “sorry I’m not coming” (because his dad no longer wanted him to use the car). So I was upset and everything but I got over it, but now I just found out that he did end up going out, just not to see me... and I just feel really shit about it. Like I’ve already been having a bad day and I just wanted some comforting ren if it was only for an hour..
I just don’t know what to do. I’m quite angry to be honest, I just feel super unloved and it sucks.