How to tell if I’m dilating?

My obstetrician said she doesn’t check to see if her patients are dilating until they’re 39 weeks pregnant but everyone else seems to be getting checked earlier. I’ve been getting period cramps and back pain (mild) off and on for the past 3 days. How can I tell if I’m dilating if she won’t check until 39 weeks? I’m currently 35 weeks.

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