Anyone know my pain?

I’ve been wanting a child basically my entire life. Children have always been a passion of mine. The only thing I’ve ever wanted. I met the love of my life December 2015 and we started trying October 2018. It’s coming up to a year of us ttc baby number one and still nothing. I get on my knees and pray ever night hoping that God will bless us with a healthy baby. But prayers are left unanswered. We have both been sober for over two years and have been working hard to live a better life. Maybe I will never have kids? We definitely can’t afford IVF. There are days that I am hopeful we will have our sweet baby but days like today I feel defeated. I know it is all on his timing but I can’t help but feel broken. The most magical thing in the world that most women can do, I can not. Some words of encouragement/stories of your experiences would be much appreciated. I am being transparent and vulnerable with you all right now. I don’t know what else to do.. 😞