I have postpartum depression. Why is that so hard to accept & admit?

I had my son on August 5th & it was rough from the start, he wouldn't latch so a nurse had to literally massage milk out onto a spoon to give him. That's when it started, I felt like a failure.

Now almost 4 weeks later, I'm sad & moody. I've isolated myself to my bedroom pretty much, whenever I leave my room all I want to do is go back. The only thing that helps is when I hold my baby boy.

I keep snapping at my boyfriend because he works so much & I miss him & feel like I need him or I'm gonna lose it without him there. It makes no sense to me but I can't help it.

Part of me is starting to accept it, I've admitted that I need to talk to my doctor but why do I feel so much shame & like a disappointment?

Nobody warned me about this. I knew I was going to be tired & overwhelmed but I didn't anticipate this.