Depression !!

I honestly feel like I can’t have kids due to my ex boyfriend 😓😞 dude beat on me one time and that one time he gave his all into making me hurt 😢 hitting me everywhere! Since then I wasn’t able to hold a damn child at all. He gets a damn child but me shhhhitttt I GET NO KIDS JUST DEATH DAYS 😢😭😭😞 I’m repeatedly bd ttc at least one child or maybe two, but I let my current husband down 😞 now we have to spend a lot of money to try and make a child instead of doing it properly !