Minimalist wedding?

Am I the only weirdo who doesn’t want a traditional wedding?

We don’t like crowds or being the center of attention, we don’t like showers, bachelor/ette parties, rehearsals or choosing bridal parties and worrying about upsetting anyone, we don’t have any desire to spend $30K on an event, we don’t want to have to host or stress, and we don’t like tacky dance music and loud DJs or drunk people. 😅

We just want a really simplistic and intimate ceremony in nature with immediate family, a few photos with our loved ones, a champagne toast, and short & sweet dinner at a luxe restaurant afterwards and then we want to be alone together and go on our trip. Why is that so crazy?!