Having a hard time with my past.. help?

Question

Okay, so about 5 years ago when I had turned 18, I had lost my virginity and I was very serious about protection. I knew how important it was.
But a few months later I had become close with a group of people, I went to a few parties and got drunk.. I ended up having unprotected sex with 3 people. I don’t talk to that group of people anymore either. I felt so gross for such a long time and I still do to this day. I would get tested for months up until 2 years ago. Luckily I never contracted anything. But I can’t let it go. I know I wasn’t in the right state of mind, I know that wasn’t me. But I still let it happen. I feel like such a bad person. I have never done anything like that since, and I never plan too. What hurts is how disappointed my mom would be in me, because she always made it a point to make smart choices. Anyone have any similar feelings? Any advice? Thanks in advance

Answer

You learned your boundaries. You grew from that experience. And you realized what you needed. You did a lot to become a better person and you shouldn’t forget those things. We all make mistakes and we all get lost in places we thought we wouldn’t be, but you deserve to forgive yourself, you don’t deserve to beat yourself up.

Answer

Check out the book “Healing the Shame that binds You” by John Bradshaw.
Imagine you had a child that did the same thing, would you want her to feel riddled with guilt or be free from it? What would you say to her if she came to you with the problem you are having now to help her feel better? Tell the same thing to yourself, with compassion and care.  
You did the best you could at the time with the tools you had.  It’s okay.  Your toolbox has likely grown since then too. 💕

Answer

Stop letting it bother you- you did it, learned from it and have moved on. There’s nothing left to do. You can’t change it, worrying and feeling bad about it does nothing but hurt you. You’re good. If you can’t let it go, see a therapist.

Answer

Just remind yourself of how far you've come. Maybe reach out to a therapist, they may be able to help you talk through your feelings and move forward.

Answer

Stop hanging with that group of people because obviously they knew you was too drunk and didn’t even bother in taking care of you and those guys knew better and just took advantage of you .

Having a hard time with my past.. help?

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