Am I the only one?

Question

Man everyone says it’s difficult to go through that first pregnancy after loss. I never thought it would be this hard to calm my mind and retrain it. I’m currently in the same weeks I lived through before just 4- 6w+6. It’s incredibly tough to keep myself happy and calm and spreading love and growth to my little one currently growing inside me. How do you guys cope? How do you think positively when your head gets crazy?

Answer

I honestly never fully felt comfortable. I was worried the ENTIRE pregnancy, but I did a lot to not let that consume me and to enjoy it. Distract your mind as much as possible, keep your self busy & avoid reading or looking into anything negative that could make it harder for you.

Answer

I've found it's helpful to have one or two trusted people to talk to about how I'm feeling. If you have a partner who has gone through loss with you before, a family member or friend who has experienced a miscarriage or still birth... it can be a huge source of support and comfort. We haven't told anyone except for my best friend and mother. Both of those two have gone through similar (even much worse) losses and they've been a rock for my SO and myself. 
I've also cut down on how much obsessive research I do. When I read and research, my anxiety tends to grow. Education *is* power, but it's helped me to focus less on things I can't control. Whenever I get uneasy, I've focused on the things I *can* control. 
I'm currently 8wks 6 days with my rainbow baby! Things seem to be going well this time, but I'm still terrified to relax and enjoy this little miracle. It's helped me to stop and check the runaway worry train before it gets too far from the station. Personally, I've focused on the fact that despite everything I'm pregnant again! My body is doing it's very best, and so am I! I still worry, but focusing on *this* pregnancy and the things that are going right have helped me a lot. If I find myself dwelling on my previous loss or worries about my current pregnancy, I make myself run through all of the positive things that have happened so far and all of the things that I'm doing that are good for myself and baby. It's not easy, but I've noticed a huge improvement in how I feel.
Hang in there and feel free to reach out if you ever need to talk more. ❤ It's impossible to control everything, so focus on doing your best. That's all you can do after all.

Am I the only one?

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