Ruining my marriage
Please give advice!!
This post will be somewhat of a rant. I’m very upset and scared.
My husband constantly puts his family and mother before me. In any situation. I told him that I get scared because I dont even think he knows who matters more to him. His mom is very manipulative and has so much power over him. It hasn’t always been this way, she and the rest of the family just came into his life recently. He is willing to hurt my feelings so he doesn’t have to sacrifice anything with her. Her feelings matter more than anyone’s. He will not set boundaries with her for fear that he will hurt her. She has been manipulating him with her feelings since day one of their relationship. I am so lost. I feel so insecure because her and I don’t get along and I’m so afraid she’ll try more to get between my husband and I. We’re newlyweds. We just got married a month ago. When him and I moved in together she got mad at him because she thought he wasn’t giving her enough attention because of me.
Every argument we have about her he just dismisses me and says I only have a problem because I don’t like her. Its not true... she manipulates him and hurts his relationships with other family members, sometimes OBVIOUSLY on purpose! Just to create drama and keep him close to her and not that particular family member.
I’m so scared that this is going to ruin my marriage before it even begins. I’ve known my husband for years and was with him before he met her and we didn’t have any of these problems. I can’t stand her being constantly put before me, and it really hurts that he doesn’t understand how I’m feeling about it. We’re currently not even talking. He’s visiting her in another state and we likely will not speak again until he comes back here on sunday. I’ve sent him messages already, he has not responded.
Edit: yes, he grew up without his mom in his life. She got him and all his four siblings taken away at a young age and never made moves to get them back. She could have, but she didn’t. She never made any moves to get into contact with any of them either.