I want to give up.
I'm tired of fighting this illness that will someday kill me. Why do I bother with treatment? Why do I bother trying to extend my life yet another day? I'm miserable anyway, my life isn't going anywhere. I'm stuck in a horrible situation that I'll likely never get out of before I die. Further treatment is too expensive. Why am I fighting? It's slowly killing me and will win someday no matter what I do. My organs will soon give up, my kidney, heart, and lung function is going downhill faster than ever. Why am I just extending my suffering? I'll die young regardless. May as well spare the heartbreak of living in this situation any longer and just quit fighting... I am tired. A tired that can't be fixed with sleep.
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