Self harm.

I haven’t self harmed in years I’ve been clean for a good 8 years but I am now getting thoughts of it again and I did it today (self bruising) and it kind of scared me that I actually did it... im in a dark place right now. I’m just feeling so depressed, unwanted, and useless. I feel like I can’t talk to anybody because I don’t want my family to think I’m sensitive or crazy. I know I need to pray and reconnect myself with God but it’s been so hard for me lately. I haven’t had any suicidal thoughts lately ( I haven’t for about a year now) but today I had a strong thought of self harming again and I actually acted on it I’m so disgusted and disappointed in myself.