I can't be the only one

So I have been trying to make plans with both my and my husbands family for Thanksgiving, it's a huge pain in the ass of course. I have a toddler and the issue is planning visits around his nap.

So many people (older of course) are telling me I'm stupid for worrying about his nap and that my 17mo will just 'fall a sleep when's he's exhausted'. No. He won't. He naps at the same time everyday and if he doesn't nap he's a miserable screaming mess. He doesn't sleep wherever he has a very specific routine, he sleeps at home. He hates the car and we don't have a 2 hour drive to accommodate his nap anyway. He won't sleep at someone's house while we eat.

They say I should just go about the day and forget the nap. Um. No.

Am I alone in this?! It's not just Thanksgiving they say this daily... Like if they call and want to come over or go out somewhere and I say well he naps at that time they say just take him out anyway.... NO!