I told my mom that I felt like hurting myself because I felt so low. I’ve been feeling low for a while before I even got pregnant. I thought I could manage the depression and anxiety by trying to handle it myself.

My mom called the cops to come check on me. Well they took me in to the psych ward to get an evaluation to make sure I’m not a danger to myself or society.

It was horrible there to be in a psych ward. A staff member forced me to get out of a chair I was sitting in just minding my own business. He laughed at me when I said I wanted to go home. Before I got out the chair, I told him not to touch me as I was getting aggravated. What does he do? He touched me and I slapped his hand away. I tried to get out but only staff can open the doors. I was mad about the staff member putting his hand on me. They took me outside into the hall. The male doctor said to take a pill or get a shot. I didn’t want to take medicine cause I didn’t need it. They said I have to and I said I don’t give my consent for it. They held me against the wall and forced me to get a shot in my back. I told them if they had hurt my baby I was going to sue their asses. Another male staff pulled my arms back and ended up bruising my arms. The guy that touched me was on my legs. They treated me like I was crazy.

After that incident, I went to go eat and the stuff they injected me with made me pass out. I had to go to the Er to find out what’s wrong. They wanted to put an iv in me and I said no I just need to eat and some water. It worked. I drunk some water and ate a snack which helped raise my blood pressure and lower my heart rate.

I returned to the psych ward and they were skipping my name. It took until late at night for them to get me processed. I had to have two people that knew me to say they felt I would be safe at home. I chose my boyfriend and my mother. I got to go home around 1:30 am.

Never ever will I want to go back there. I realized self harm isn’t worth going to a place this awful and treat people like they’re animals. They had two people screaming racist slurs a woman and a man. It was scary cause the woman just started screaming saying fuck you n word. The man said it because he was hungry and didn’t want to wait an hour to eat lunch. So definitely not a place I’d want to be at.

I agreed to go see a counselor and get help. They also prescribed my anti depression and anxiety medication.