Anticipation kills

Jaeii

So I just recently started going through a process of TTC my first child. I am 25 and mind you, apart of the LGBT community. I have a friend who has been helping me through the process, and I started preparing my body and made the attempt in the last 2 months. The first time I tried I was off with my timing and ovulation which caused me to get a BFN. This time, I was trying to be on point as much as I could and made sure to be inseminated when my ovulation tests were reading correct timing. The latest attempt was made on 12/21. I was supposed to start my period on the 5th (Jan) and so far im into my second day not receiving it. I am usually very on point with my menstrual as my cycle is averaged at 31 days. I am bad with holding off taking the tests and waiting for the right timing so I had taken one a week or so back and got a negative. I feel like the waiting part has been the hardest and I'm just wondering if anybody can give me any tips. And or things I can focus on or do in the meantime to keep my mind off it a little bit. My friends tell me that I will know as a woman's intuition but to me I'm I'm not sure that I am even allowing the feelings to be there because I am so scared to get a negative test again, that I am preparing myself for it. I am working on a lot of things in my life so if this doesn't happen now I will wait another five months to TTC again. I am very new to the app and was recommended by a friend. I went through and I loved all the support I have seen so I thought i would give it a try