I don't know how I feel about my pregnancy anymore.

I am happy about it. I just know it will be hard work especially since my daughter already has health issues. It was unplanned and the night I got pregnant I felt pressured to please my partner, he literally told me I was boring and unless I'm drunk I'm pretty stiff during sex. I was so close to just storming out the room and I didn't. Prior to this I insisted we needed protection, well the sex happened and he came without a warning. Afterwards I felt pretty crappy as expected since he had put me down. I checked my app and I discovered there was a high risk of pregnancy. I took the morning after pill, however I was already pregnant which I realised 3 weeks later.

Im now 10 weeks pregnant and I am stressed. My partner is treats me like a lodger, he is very cold with me. Wants me to itemise all my expenses from month to month, complains I don't like paying bills when I always chase him for money. Accused me of starving our daughter and letting her cry. He doesn't like to spend money on anything except weed and recently alcohol. Hell say he's going shopping and come back with nothing. It was never this bad but now it's like he's a different person. He said he was happy about the baby and I thought he would be motivated to at least find a better job, nope he is still stuck in the same job.

He's never been the happiest person, but he's been really miserable around my family. He makes zero effort when I plan to go to a family event. My mums helped us with looking after our one year old, one day she was a little late and he didn't hide his annoyance. He sat in his car for half an hour (he didn't tell me this part), then moaned to me that he didn't have enough time to get ready. He should have been grateful to have the help, I would never have acted like that with his mum.

I've wanted to christen our daughter for soo long and at one point he liked the idea. He's been against and I stupidly listened to him everytime he complained about a church or didn't want to go. I've ended up organising the whole thing myself, I'll probably pay for everything too. Because I've realised he doesn't like the fork out money but deflects and tells me I'm the one that doesn't like to pay bills.

I am tired and I know I'll be worse when the baby gets here with minimal help from him.