Trying to Set Boundaries with MIL but She’s Not Having it... HELP!

Let me preface this by saying that my mother-in-law not respecting the boundaries that my husband and I try to set with her has been an ongoing issue in our marriage. Admittedly, we usually give in and do whatever it is that she wants (we’re people-pleasers!) For example, at Christmas, we tried to set a boundary that we didn’t want to travel this year, that she could come and visit us instead, but in the end we still went and visited her anyway. She has this way of guilt-tripping us into doing things her way. And the holidays is one thing, but our second baby is due in March and I’ll be having a scheduled c-section. When the date was finalized the other day, I messaged her to let her know and told her that we’d be glad for her to come see us in the hospital the day after the surgery (I had an unexpected c-section with my first and after that experience, this time I’d like a day to rest, relax, recuperate, establish breastfeeding, and bond before we have visitors). Initially, she basically just said no, that she’s gonna be there waiting for us after the surgery because if god forbid anything happens she’d never forgive herself if she wasn’t there... so I said, “Well, can I just have Cory (my husband) run out to you afterwards and let you know everything’s okay? The whole point is that we don’t want visitors the day of the surgery.” Then she asked why no visitors, and does Cory feel the same (he does). I told her the reasons I already mentioned, adding that it’s nothing personal and that this applies to everyone not just her, because I know I’ll be feeling groggy and simply don’t want to deal with visitors in that state. To which she responded just “Ok,” and proceeded to immediately text my husband saying, “Don’t tell Callie because it will only upset her but my feelings are hurt...” My husband left her on read. We don’t know how to politely respond to this any further without saying something rude like THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU! It’s stressing us out. We know we’re eventually going to have to have a conversation with her about the need for her to start respecting the boundaries we have set (and at this rate that conversation is probably coming sooner rather than later!) We have caved many times before but I don’t want to cave on this and I feel like I shouldn’t have to! How can I set boundaries with my mother-in-law without coming off like a bitch? None of our other family members have taken issue with the “no visitors day of” policy! I’m trying to understand her perspective but I’m having a difficult time understanding why she feels personally attacked by my desire to have a day to rest after major abdominal surgery. 🤷‍♀️ She can still be the first to come meet the new baby the very next morning, just not that first day! Why is she causing such a fuss about this?

Rant over.