My son

My son was born without his right ear and a facial palsy. I was told this would of happened during the first two weeks of pregnancy. I remember the first two weeks perfectly. I told my then partner that I was pregnant. He instantly told me I was cheating and that the baby was not his. The amount of pain I felt when he said that was unbearable. I asked what do you want me to do? I can’t get rid of it and I would never so that. He pushed me to the ground so hard, I remember my head hitting the wall and he was screaming at me get an abortion or I’ll do it for you.

Two weeks. I was two weeks pregnant. When the doctors told me that this would have happened when he was two weeks gestation. I held back tears, as I had my father there and I didn’t want him to know what happened.. I left the day my children’s father pushed me to the floor while our daughter cried for me. Watching the man who was meant to protect us, hurt us.

I always blame myself because he deliberately elbowed me in my 28 week pregnant belly with our daughter and I didn’t leave then.. He promised he would changed and I believe him. Abuse kept happening up until he tried to murder our son inside me.

The hard thing is he wants to be in their life and I don’t want our children to not know their father...

But I don’t want them to know what he put me through when they were too little to understand.

I don’t want that to reflect how they will be treated in their future.

My children and I are survivors.