I’m Scared I Could be Pregnant

Please help! I’m starting to freak out because I am almost 25 and I’ve only been dating my boyfriend for 5 months and we are NOT ready for a baby.

I would never be able to get an abortion, personally, not that I don’t support women’s right to choose. But I worry that I would have to get an abortion if I were pregnant. Im Bipolar and on a lot of meds that would not be good for a growing fetus. They have been proven to cause birth defects. My Nurse Practitioner said I’m on a very low dose, though, and she does not believe it would harm a baby early in pregnancy.

But I’m still scared. Not to mention, I’ve been drinking and going about my social life as usual. I just would never want to do anything to harm my baby if I were pregnant. I also really think getting an abortion would destroy me psychologically and emotionally.

Im too scared to buy a pregnancy test - I know that’s stupid and I should just do it, but I’m honestly terrified. I feel like I’m just frozen with fear.

My boyfriend and I have unprotected sex regularly, but my birth control is super wacked out. I’m on Nikki (generic of Yaz) and I’m really good about taking it regularly. But last month, I missed it by literally a few hours and started my period... then when it was over I started taking the rest of my month and continued on a new pack when my period was “supposed” to happen.

So I know with normal birth control, you’re supposed to be able to skip your period, but with Nikki, I typically can’t do that. It pretty much starts when it wants to start. And NOW I’m still on the pack and a few weeks away from my next period.

I need advice - has anyone ever been in this kind of situation? What should I do?