Feeling left behind

I've been with my boyfriend for four years and since the very beginning I always gave him time to do his own thing. If he mentions hes playing video games or is hanging out with friends I'll immediately tell him that we can talk later and that I love him. He'll ask if it's fine each time, sometimes two to three times, and I tell him it is and then we talk a few hours later or the next day. I grew up in a very controlling house so I'm trying to provide him with freedom because I know what it's like to feel constrained and I also just dont want to be one of THOSE girlfriends. You know the ones, the ones that hate when they dont have their boyfriends full attention and act like a parasite. Lately though I've been feeling like an option for him and each time I say that it's fine that he goes it hurts and he doesn't ask if it's fine as much anymore. We're long distance and I'm incredibly busy during the week so we settle for calling during weekends in the late afternoon/night and for the past few months we havent because hes been busy until 11 or sometimes 1 AM his time, and I'm an hour ahead so I'm usually asleep by then. I know weekends are free time but... he does online schooling so he isnt busy all week and weekend nights are supposed to be our time... I'm glad he gets to socialize but now hes suddenly going to get togethers every Monday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday with his friends. Which means he was busy on valentine's day too and we didnt talk at all because I was asleep by the time he got home at 1 Am his time. And this part is TMI but we used to be super sexually active, usually him initiating it more then me, and now all the sudden nothing. We havent done anything in over a month. I've tried dropping hints and he didnt pick them up, I tried being blunt and he completely ignored the attempt and started talking about something else. I just dont know what to do. I'm glad hes seeing his friends but... I just feel really alone now.