If you have children, would you prefer to be a SAHM and live a flight away from your support system, OR work full time but live around your family/friends?

Question

SAHM = stay at home mom
Currently trying to make this decision and I’m having the hardest time! Would love to hear personal experiences.

Answer

I love being a stay at home mom because I get to be the primary caregiver of my baby. She’s so little and I would feel guilty having someone else being her primary caregiver. I get to spend a lot of time with her and teach her new things and watch her grow every day. That being said, it is not easy being a stay at home mom mentally. You have to make sure you are connected to others or you will feel isolated.

Answer

Being a stay at home mom is hard on your mental health, being a working mom is hard on your heart.
No easy choice, you and your partner need to decide what works best for your family

Answer

I’m a stay at home mum and while I do the majority of it by myself, it’s so lovely to have my parents and my in-laws to pop in to see or watch him for a couple hours for date nights and also for baby to have family around and have a relationship with them on a daily basis, I do miss working but I also couldn’t bare the thought of someone else watching him all day long, but I think if I had to, I would rather work and have family near by, as after a few years kids would be in school and I’d go back to work anyway

Answer

I work full time and live very far from my family (other than kids and SO, they are with me). I only see my parents and sister and niece and in-laws (who are awesome) once a year for about two weeks. It sucks! I miss them all so much and my kids really really miss their grandparents. My kids are always talking about what we’ll do when we are together again. If I were you, I’d stay close to family (if you get along well) and friends. Do not leave your support system!

Answer

I find my job really interesting and I love the people I work with - so for me it makes sense to keep working.  I have a great support system here with family nearby so it works out well.  If I didn’t like my job, I’d definitely consider being a SAHM.

Answer

I love my career. I work a job where I can take work from home days throughout the school year, have a month and a half “off” during summer, and can use flex time if I’m running late or need to leave early as long as I make it up. We live around both of our families. They babysit for us and are wonderful. Before we had kids, we considered moving a few states away but decided against it. It’s nice to have family around.

Answer

I’ve been in both situations. I was a stay at home mom with my family being a 10 hour flight away from me and having no support. I felt like I was slowly losing myself. Rotting inside. Going to waste.
I work now while my partner stays home with the kids and works from home part time. My family is a 10 minute walk away from me and I have backups everywhere. My depression got so much better. I have a purpose (not that raising your kids isn’t a purpose but it doesn’t challenge your mind). When I’m home, I spend as much time with my kids as possible and I honestly don’t feel like I am missing out or anything.
So that decision is an easy one for me

Answer

I’m currently a SAHM who lives a plane ride away from family, and my spouse travels for work for extended periods.
It’s wonderful that I get to spend this time with my daughter, but I miss working. A lot.  It can be rough not having that break that family can provide. 
Grocery shopping? Strap that baby In a carrier with you. Running errands? Baby is with you every place. Date night? Find a sitter. Exhausted and sick? Pop some DayQuil, push through the days, and pray you don’t also get the baby sick. 
I love seeing all of her milestones. And she is the best 💯 percent over and over. It would just be nice to have family near to help. 
She is going into daycare part time this coming month and my mama heart is breaking, but I know I need to work for my mental health... even part time.

Answer

I prefer to be a working mom. While I love my kids, it’s very isolating to be home with them alone every single day. I’ve also considered long term— once they’re in school it just seems silly for me to stay home alone, but by that point when all my kids are in school (like 5-8 years) I would be so far out of the working world that it would be very difficult to get a good paying job in my field.

Answer

Am a SAHM and love it. Also my partner is in another country and I haven't considered leaving my support system to go stay with him. Reason being I would still be a SAHM there for I don't know how long and have to depend on him yet here, I get to go back to work after my maternity leave and I don't think I would handle the challenges being there without my support system on top of the challenges I would have having to depend on another adult for everything. I say stay with your support system.

If you have children, would you prefer to be a SAHM and live a flight away from your support system, OR work full time but live around your family/friends?

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