I can’t keep doing this to myself

Back and forth and back and forth here we are once again. Lying in my bed crying over this guy that is not worth my time at all. We’ve been talking for 6ish months and it’s been rocky lately. We’ll text nonstop for a few days and I’ll be so happy but then he flat out stops. Idk where he goes. He just disappears for a few weeks then shows back up. I do the same thing every time. Cry and be sad for about a week or two then convince myself I’m a strong ass woman...listen to Woman by Kesha on repeat and forget about his sorry ass. Just by the time I’m over it he comes crawling back asking for more. (Probably because he knows I’ll come right back) I know he doesn’t care about me at all. He only comes to me for sexual interests which I enjoy but it’s beginning to be so damn toxic. I try to convince myself that it’s fine because I enjoy doing sexual things with him and I try so hard not to actually get feelings but I know I do. I care about him. He’s always on my mind and I guess the attention from him even though it doesn’t mean shit to him compared to how it means to me is just nice. I haven’t had a boyfriend in over two years. I guess I’m kind of lonely and he’s filled this piece missing from my heart. That sounds really juvenile but it’s true. He’s such a toxic person and I feel sick when he goes missing from my phone notifications. I need to get rid of him. He needs to be out of my life. But it’s so hard and I don’t know what steps I need to take. Please. I need to move on from this piece of shit. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you guys,

One sad girl.