What's worse?

Question

This hits a sore spot for me. I come from a divorced household and I would never wish that for my kids. It was very unhealthy and we were used against the other parent a lot. There was a constant stream of new relationships happening on both sides that was very confusing growing up. 
Now on the other hand my SO's mother decided to stay with her cheating husband for the kids, he grew up seeing 2 people not love each other and that has come with a very dysfunctional, unhealthy family situation. My grandparents also did this and lived amd still live in different bedrooms. They simply coexist in the same house and hate each other.
So which is worse? Staying miserable in your current relationship for the kids or divorcing and forcing them to live through that life?

Answer

I dont think an unhealthy relationship benefits anyone and is probably worse for the kids

Answer

I think children can pick up on all types of unhealthy relationships. Staying together purely for the children isn’t any better than divorcing & being terrible co-parents. 
The goal is for everyone to be happy. If that means divorcing & being the best damn co-parent/friend in the world, that should be the goal.

Answer

Neither. Going to counseling and working on your marriage.

Answer

My parents divorced and it was completely disfunctional. Even after the divorce, things were always ugly. 
I think either way could work, as long as the parents can coexist and be civil. 
I voted to stay together because being a new mom, I'd do just about anything for the benefit of my child. And having parents, and eventually grandparents who are still married is really important to me. Hopefully we will never have to face unfaithfulness, but if we did, I'd try to work it out somehow.

Answer

Staying simply for the kids is way worse & never a good idea, for anyone, especially the kids. Yes, there are struggles that happen with a divorce, but in the end, children seeing their parents happier even if that means them not being together, is so much healthier for them. Also, not all divorces are toxic.

Answer

I am an only child. My parents stayed together just because of me. I wished and hoped all the time for them to get divorced from the time I was 5 until they got divorced when I was 21. I wanted them to be happy and being together was not it.

Answer

I think either of these situations are not good. When divorce parents have good co parenting relationship that’ will show the kids what a good relationship is and also not having a slew of relationship in and out of there kids life . Your kids need to be put first not your anger towards the spouse or your own needs .

Answer

Toxic parents are the problem. 
Not the divorce. But if people are that far out, how can you know it wouldn't have been the same at home? Trying to get you to pick sides and in general being mean towards each other.
Being happy is what is best.

Answer

Staying together. My dad was an alcoholic and it caused a lot of issues in my mom & dads relationship. They stayed together and divorced once I turned 18 because they didn’t want me and my brother to grow up in a broken home. It was worse for us this way because it was right as we became “adults” and we never saw a real loving relationship. We learned how to just deal with our partners, not necessarily stand up for ourselves. I think it’s better to grow up with happy parents, together or not.

Answer

Staying together. Divorce finally brought peace to our family. My mom met a great man who we all adore and think of as dad. My real dad doesn’t give 2 shits about ya really, but does want to brag about our accomplishments as if he had something to do with them... when in reality he’s never around and never supported us once he left. 
My in laws are together. Hubby and I are 33, and they are mean and nasty to each other. I asked once, why don’t you guys get a divorce if you hate each other so much? I mean the lies, theft, blame, etc. it’s so annoying and not healthy. So we try not to see them very often.

What's worse?

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