Is someone cheats on you does this mean they don’t love you?

Me and my boyfriend have had a rough relationship, we’ve been dating for 4+ years. I love him a lot. He is a user of drugs and alcohol he has been for around 2 years now I hate it we’d argue like everyday about it, toxic I know.

For some reason he says ‘he can’t leave me’ he says he loves me all the time. Obviously words don’t mean much. There were always doubts in my mind that he had cheated on me I used to nag him all the time about because I’m a bitch and now he has cheated ☹️ I’m not sure 100% if he has physically but he has been messaging girls when he was drunk and that. Asking for bum pics and that 💔 he also sent pictures of his abs to some girls😢I’ve seen the messages, because we were both so controlling and I’m just some paranoid idiot we didn’t really associate with the opposite sex, yes I know we need to grow up.

He had also been talking to this girl for months, I did have a feeling about it but they lied and said they’d spoken once. The girl said they were just ‘friends’. They’d talk all the time and he’d obviously had forgotten about me I think he liked her 😢

I’ve got depression and anxiety, I just can’t do this anymore. Just please do this poll I know he’s done this and I should leave but I can’t 😭 i feel so angry I just hate everything and I feel so suicidal.

I wanna get over it because he said he will change he said he doesn’t want to lose me, he says he doesn’t know why he done it and said because he’s a ‘c*nt’ he has phoned me in tears many times, saying he feels terrible. I just wanna hear everyone’s opinions on whether a cheater can love and be in love with you.