How much weight should I lose or gain?

Shelly • 19 • he/they • autism and bpd • 26/5/21 💞

I’m 16, around 5’3 and I weigh roughly 115lbs.

2 years ago, I weighed 130lbs but lost 15lbs last summer in the space of 4 months due to anorexia.

In September I stopped eating for a week and nearly passed out. I lost 3lbs and felt horrible but was satisfied with my weight loss.

I have gained that weight back since and I’m still having trouble shedding off some Christmas weight (I gained 4lbs in a week which brought my weight back up to 119lbs).

I really wanna be 100lbs but I also want to become more muscular which would mean I’d have to gain weight since muscle weighs more than fat.

What should I do?