Was I in the wrong?

Question

This is long but please please bear with me. This has been heavily on my mind lately and Id love some input from other perspectives. my best friend of 22 years and I broke up last year. Before I get into that a small back story is that our moms were both teen moms togather mine 18 and hers being 14 and went to the same school program to graduate, they became BEST friends and raised us togather, also before you judge both of them were wonderful very successful moms who have done excellent in life dispite the rough beginnings. 
My best friend and I were literally made for each other, we drive each other nuts, but our love runs deep. And we have literally been friends since infanthood.
Unfortunately my mom and my best friend are very similar to each other and have a rough time understanding one another. My best friend is very hot tempered and immature in a lot of ways, she started picking fights with my mom and being disrespectful but she always saw it as "standing up for herself" she would get upset if my mom ever objected to something in her lifestyle she knew was bad for her. But my mom wasn't just some lady to her, she was a parent too. She's raised Sam just as much as her own mom. And her own mom wasn't ever upset with anything my mom might have disagreed with. But for Sam, suddenly this was a problem. They got in a huge fight on my go get a wedding dress day and blew up at each other. I talked to them both, my mom who was in tears and my best friend who was just being incredibly stubborn and managed to mend it for the day. After some time things did not get better and my mom and her mother fell apart too due to several reasons that are just as sad but way too long to explain, after some major thinking I made the decision to cut Sam from my life because I decided I could not be best friends with someone who had a deep rift with my mother. My mother did not want me to cut ties but I really felt it was the right thing to do.
Lately I have been missing Sam deeply. This is not the first time I've had to let go of a toxic relationship. And so I've been feeling SO lonely. In my breakup letter to her I told her that I'd always love her and that for the time being I just could not close to her. So we are friends on IG and that's it, but even that can be hard. She was an aunt to my daughter and my best friend of 22 years. I hoped she would come back but her pride is so strong im not sure she ever will. I used to be confident about my choice but now that It's hurting more and more I'm not so sure. Was I wrong to cut ties or did I do the right thing?

Answer

Cutting ties doesn't have to be forever. It sounds like you did what was necessary to remove drama from your life at the time. There is nothing wrong with that. It doesn't mean it has to be the total end. People can and do change. You can test the waters if you feel comfortable with it and try to mend fences. Just don't put yourself in a position where she makes things bad for you again.

Answer

I couldn't be friends with someone that made my mom cry. She should respect you enough to never be in the posting of even having an argument with your mom. As much as this is a loss for you, from what your written I think you've done the right thing ☹️

Answer

If you're the one to cut ties, then don't expect her to be one to re-engage with you.

Answer

I grew up with my sister from another mister... we were inseparable all through highschool. I had my first child at 17 and she had hers at 18. I can't even tell you what happened but her and I stopped speaking she was so mad at me but couldn't tell me why. She just ignored me and booted me out of her life. I was the prideful one so when she did that I retaliated and only made it worse. We stopped speaking for 2 years. No contact at all. We ran into each other randomly it was awkward.  I think we exchanged numbers and started texting or something. I had 2 kids and she was pregnant with her second. We started slow just texting, then talking on the phone, then play dates and slowly but surely we built our friendship back up and it is now stronger then ever. Our kids are cousins and we are aunties to each other kids. We still rive each other crazy but we are truly sisters. Your bond might just need time. Maturity. I had to grow and she had to grow so that we could respect each other and see each others point of views.  Give it time. You will find each other again.

Answer

No you weren't wrong. I also cut ties with my best friend of 14 years. She never had "time" for me and would cancel on me last minute. She was very disrespectful towards your mom and no one has that right and I wouldn't tolerate it. If she was your TRUE friend she would suck up her ego and apologize and make peace because she would value your friendship a lot more. You didnt lose a best friend because your mom is and always will be your best friend

Answer

You made the right choice, it maybe hard but only time will heal.

Answer

I don't think so. I cut ties with who used to be a very very good friend. She went off the deep end into drugs and that, so I had no choice.

If you become friends again down the road great! If you don't that is fine too. Sometime people just need time and space, and sometimes they never grow up.

But for now. Take it one day at a time. Everyone's break up heal rate is different. Your mileage will vary.

Was I in the wrong?

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