Fiance refuses to help with chores

My fiancé and I have lived together for almost 3 years. We’ve lived in 3 different homes over this time. The home we live in now is the smallest and is also owned by his family who live on the same property. We have very little privacy and neither one of us really enjoy being home because of this reason.

Over the course of our relationship, I’ve never expected him to be perfect when it comes to cleanliness, but he used to help with small chores like taking out the trash, yard work, etc. I took care of the rest. Most of the time I’d also help with the yard work also. In our current home, we really don’t have any yard work, so I ask him to help with the trash about once a week which has to be taken to the front of the property and to get dog food about once a month when he’s in town. My job has a long commute to a very rural area, so I have no stores I can stop at unless I go out of my way on my drive home.

Now he’s never been the best with putting his stuff away, but I feel like it’s gotten 10x worse. He refuses to throw his trash away. He snacks in the middle of the night, and I’ll find wrappers on the floor, near the trash can (but never inside), or food left open on the counter. He also refuses to use the hamper for his clothes. I find his clothes all over our small house (but never in the hamper).

My job is hard on me mentally but not physically, whereas his is very physical. I have a long daily commute, but have weekends off, whereas he has the ability to make his own hours and can have really long days, but he most often ends his day drinking with his buddies. This is often a point of argument when I get frustrated with his lack of help around the house. He doesn’t like being home because he says his family always wants something out of him and he never gets a break. I don’t like being home because of the lack of privacy, but I know the chores won’t do themselves.

Things I’ve tried to get him to help:

-asking him nicely to help out (asking for trash and dog food mostly)

-asking him through text after I leave for work and before he gets out of bed

-asking him via note left in his truck (method he asked for)

-losing it and starting an argument

-leaving the trash and clothes everywhere hoping he’d get tired of looking at it

I’m asking for more suggestions on how to get him to help. I’m at a loss. I try to do at least one small chore a day during the week so it helps with my weekend chores, but it’s still not enough. I leave early and get home late, so it’s hard to do a lot besides cook dinner and go to bed. I get so angry when I start to clean on the weekends because I feel like I spend too much time just picking up trash and clothes before I can really deep clean.