Wishing for a home birth but won’t get one

Tbh I never wanted to have a birth in a hospital but even less now and I really really wish my situation was capable to have a home birth

I don’t know a ton of people who are having twins who are having home births and there aren’t an midwives in my state( that are close to me) that do them

Idk

It sucks because my pregnancy is incredibly uncomplicated for being high risk and I just don’t want to have to do it in a hospital

But I don’t have a choice

Okay rant over