I feel like I’ve made a huge mistake. B4 getting into this relationship I prayed to God. God told me that I would be with this man but that he would not be the same man I knew. God told me that things would be more difficult. And here I am engaged to the man. Now all of what I have been told has come to past. As expected. Except I feel terrible! So terrible that I’m even second guessing whether I heard the voice of God or if I was just psyching myself out. And it’s weird because I’ve always been 100% sure this man would be my husband and father of my children and I even had God’s word to back me up. Now I feel like maybe I’m not even supposed to be here because things have gone sooooo very sour. The relationship is a breeding ground for resentment, distrust, and loathing. There are good days yes but the foundation of this relationship is one that has been eaten up by termites! Our relationship is not centered on God enough and it should be. We are on two different pages. I am not perfect. I am a work in progress and have to accept that everyone is in a process.

However, I fear that the engagement is coming to an end rather than leading to marriage. I don’t feel we are bringing glory to God in this relationship. The thought of that rips me up completely😭. But what if God doesn’t want this for me, I just wanted this for myself?

All feedback is appreciated.