Feeling distant - need advice

Today is my husband’s birthday. Recently, I have felt myself starting to check out of this relationship. I don’t feel like my needs are being met (yes I’ve talked to him and told him how I feel loved, he said he just can’t be that way) and I just do not feel loved and am feeling very sad relationship wise. I feel so emotionally distant from him, I don’t want to have sex, don’t really feel like talking or being with him.

Today is his birthday. I’ve told him happy birthday and that I could find a babysitter if he’d like to go out to eat tonight. But I feel absolutely no spark or love for him, so I’m not making a big deal about his birthday. I feel absolutely terrible. He was so nice to me on this past Mother’s Day, made a big deal and let me have “my day” but I just can’t force myself to feel any happiness or fun for his birthday. I feel like a failure as a wife.

I can’t even tell him how I’m feeling because it’s his birthday. He would hang it over my head and I would feel absolutely terrible for as long as he would bring it up about how I gave him a shitty birthday.

Not sure if this is a rant or cry for advice. Maybe both 😞