I am finally admitting this. I am jealous. I am jealous whenever I see a happy couple, I am jealous whenever I hear happy stories from others or read them on this app. After 3 years of being miserable in my own abusive relationship, I am finally getting the courage to leave. I have been jealous for the past 3 years because I felt that I never deserved anything better. I finally got the courage to stop being jealous of others and seek that feeling for myself.

My partner has been emotionally, physically and financially abusive. No matter how hard I tried he was never happy with me, I was never enough. He has been using me sexually, emotionally, financially and domestically. I don't fucking deserve that. He has been talking shit behind my back, rarely did anything good for me. He has never wanted to please me sexually, always left me high and dry. Kept breaking promises. Treated me like garbage, and I never realized that that's not okay. I thought I deserved that and that he was too good for me. I left all of my friends and almost left my own family for him.

I am building up the courage to leave. I truly hope that I find the happiness that I deserve and that one day my story will inspire someone to seek better for themselves.

Wish me luck on my journey to find happiness ❤