I have always heard that you have a baby shower if someone is willing to host it, but you never ask for one because that is selfish.

I don’t know. We are pregnant with our first, live in the town that my in laws live, but no one from my side. My in laws have discussed throwing a shower, but nothing has happened or been mentioned to me about doing it. I don’t ask or bring it up so no one feels obligated.

I don’t know if it will happen. I’m 20 weeks at this point and am unsure what I should do. I don’t know if I should ask about it because that seems odd to me. “Are you throwing me a baby shower or not?” Of course I wouldn’t say that, but still. I also don’t want to throw my own. “Hey everyone, I’m having a baby! Give me things.” We have most of what we need, but my husband is headed to medical school and it would be nice to have some help (very unplanned pregnancy, used prevention and it didn’t prevent haha). Yet, I don’t know what is the proper way to go about it. Do I ask or just see if something happens and if it doesn’t move on?