Any prayer warriors out there that can pray for me?
I’m sorry, I didn’t know where else I could post this. I have a surgery coming up on Thursday. I’ve had issues with peri anal abscesses for over a year now after my daughter was born. I’m not sure if it’s tied to the birth or not, but I guess they’ll find out. I had it drained last April after suffering the most excruciating pain I’ve ever felt-100x worse than contractions. I prayed and prayed thinking it would just get better, but eventually I saw an ob since I thought it could be a Bartholins cyst. He said it wasn’t, but I begged him to lance something, anything before I left the office. He did and I had immediate relief. In September it came back, so back to the ob who, with a disgusted look on his face, said he remembered me (who wouldn’t remember someone who drained about a cup of nasty pus) and told me again it wasn’t a Bartholins cyst and basically dismissed me. The next day I went to another ob and she said the same thing. She directed me to a GI doctor so I went there and they said there was nothing they could do, but go to the ER instead. I went and found a wonderful general surgeon who drained it bedside since I am terrified of being put under. I called him a month later because I felt that familiar pain again and was put on antibiotics. That worked!! When I called him again another month later, we tried antibiotics again, but it didn’t work. I went to his office, but he said it wasn’t large enough to drain. I ended up back in the ER a few days later as he instructed, but he wouldn’t come down to perform the drainage. Instead, a very inexperienced PA drained it bedside and I was on my way. A month later I felt it again, but it started draining on its own. I’ve been draining since March of this year which is actually a Godsend since it would have been difficult to get to a hospital for treatment during Covid. After lots of research, I found a colorectal surgeon and she will be performing the operation on Thursday. She said it’s a simple procedure. A clean out really and possibly placing a seton which is a string tied in a loop to keep the area draining. I would have to “floss” the area several times a day. Because of the nature of this surgery, I have opted to not tell many people. My husband knows and my parents only. I feel so alone and scared. I’ll have to be in the hospital by myself and I’m so worried something will go wrong. I’m posting anonymously because it feels good to talk about it, but under any other circumstance, I would be asking my friends and family to pray for me. I need your prayers, please. My anxiety and depression is through the roof. I don’t feel like a woman. I feel disgusting and dirty and judged by doctors. I’m overweight and they say this could be a reason this has happened so it’s even worse knowing I did this to myself. Please pray for me. Pray that I have a successful surgery, that this is minor and I won’t have any lasting effects. Pray that I won’t need the seton and this will be the last time I’ll have to deal with this. I just want to be healthy and happy so that I can be a good mom and wife again. Thank you.