Finally giving up..

8 months ttc. Used preseed this month, not felt any different. I was sick with the flu during my fertile window but still did the Baby dance atleast everyother day. And for the first time in 8 months...I don't care about the 'two week wait'. I'm not nervous or anxious. More mad at myself for trying 8 months and nothing happens. I'm 12DPO. And I'm for the first time waiting to see if AF shows up. It's been so easy giving up. I think I'm just starting to think it may not happen. Never thought I would be this way....because I use to be a pee on a stick addict. And obsessing over timing and recording everything in hopes of conceiving. My husband is so anxious for me to be pregnant. I officially am giving up, in hopes of becoming pregnant.....