Well this morning I had my first ultrasound. And ommygosh, so tiny. Fell right in love. Tech showed me one pic, but once I had to do the internal... She moved it so I couldn’t see. Knew right away something was wrong. We had to wait for the radiologist and he told her my family doctor had to call me. My first thought was.. yeup, another miscarriage. I was told to think positive. But I couldn’t. She didn’t do a very good job hiding it. Knew right away from seeing her face. The look I’ll never forget. Anyways, I’m supposedly 9 weeks today. But my baby, the fetus stopped growing at 8 weeks and 3 days. I remember that day. I was talking to the baby. Tell the baby the kids are excited. Telling the baby to not leave me. Telling it i was happy to be having him. Last 4 weeks I’ve been having the most terrible morning sickness. I’ve been in and out of the hospital. Had to take the iv and Zofran. Not even an hour later I’d start puking. On a bad day, I can puke 6-10x a day. A good day, 3-5x. The day after my baby stopped growing I had the most rude doctor and nurses. They mocked me and laughed saying how much I puke. The doctor comes to discharge me, “you have to suck it up”. He wouldn’t listen to me when I said I had to get admitted with my youngest. I had to get a feeding tube. I’m not blaming them for this. I’m just sharing my experience with this rainbow pregnancy. This is now my third miscarriage in a row. Tomorrow I go for a D&C and they will be taking the fetus for tests. If you made it this far, thanks for reading. I’m just having a bad year.