What’s next!!!!????

Question

How do I fall back in love with my husband? Is this even possible? 😭💔😭💔
We have five BEAUTIFUL children and have been together for 20 years, since high school. Been through more ups and downs than I can even fathom. 
He has always had a drinking problem. And I’ve been extremely verbal about how much I hate it. He lost his father, aunt and grandmother all within a year and went into a complete downward spiral at home. Still has a very successful career... that takes almost all of his time. 
His drinking is a huge problem and I’m fed up. I’m tired of the bullshit it causes and it’s made me look down on him for the wedge it puts between us and his lack of parenting and common sense while drunk. 
I’m
So 
Lost. 
I know the grass isn’t always greener on the other side and, I’m a huge fan of watering my own... but I’m not sure how to come back from this. 💔

Answer

Details are needed. What makes you feel like you have falling outta love? Are there children involved? How long have you been married? Infidelity issues, finances, communication problems?

Answer

Absolutely. You guys have been together for 20 years! that is HUGE. But the magic does get lost overtime. It doesn’t mean it is gone and can never come back.. just lost. Both of you need to remember what it is that made you fall in love in the first place and kept you together for so long. Rekindle the flames and go back to day 1. As far as the drinking, I 100% understand your feelings as my husband has dealt with this. In his case he is obviously struggling due to emotional turmoil and needs to find a different outlet. He more than likely feels the same way about the relationship and therefore feels there is no better alternative. Fix the relationship and bring back the love and he will want to be better all on his own. We make a promise for better or worse when we marry. You may be in “the worse” right now but it shouldn’t be the end. If you are having a hard time remember what it is you love start small and really soak in gratitude. For me it was things like watching my husband interact with my kids, reiterating to myself how hardworking he was to provide for us, when he cleaned the house, made dinner, or worked on some project. Telling yourself the qualities you saw and admired. Remembering why you married him. It’s easy for us to overlook things when we don’t feel connected anymore.

Answer

Couples therapy and maybe the therapist can help urge him to seek counseling for addiction. It won’t work coming from you.

Answer

Perhaps he should start by going to rehab. You can’t have a successful, happy, healthy, thriving relationship with an alcoholic. He needs to get help, you need counseling- individual and couples. You’d need to work on the damage caused by the drinking and have a whole new sober relationship.

Answer

Will he consider attending a AA meeting even if it's one time. Death can take a toll on a person. My husband lost his Grandmother,Mom,and only Uncle all in a year span it was tough on him still is. He went to AA because of a DUI he slowed down on his drinking alot. He occasionally has a beer or hard liquor.

Answer

*Fallen

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