Are you the default parent?

Question

Comment, how you cope!! I find myself getting so frustrated about it.

Answer

I am not.
My husband and I equally do everything in the house and with our children.
We work opposite days majority of the time.

Answer

Wtf is a default parent

Answer

Yes I am. I’m a stay at home mom meanwhile my husband works a lot of shifts all at different times and a lot of times gets home by the time the kids are in bed or he leaves at the same time they wake up. 
I don’t mind it. Don’t get me wrong some days are really difficult but I always wanted to be a stay at home mom so for me I’m getting everything I always wanted. And I’m getting all the good and the bad with it. But I wouldn’t change a thing. When my husbands home he spends a lot of time with us. There’s no doubt he loves us and wants to be with us but he’s being an awesome provider

Answer

Yeah I am I'm a working mum, single mum, dad and provider!

Answer

Yes, but it isn't by my husband's choice (works 7 14 hour night shifts a week.)
I am the mom to a 3 year old boy, 2 year old boy with autism, and a 5 month old boy. 
It is very stressful at times. My 3 year old skipped his terrible 2s but hit the threenager phase full force. My autistic 2 year old gets frustrated with toys easily and spends a lot of the day having meltdowns and is up 4 hours a night. And my 5 month old baby is pretty perfect so far. 
Being patient is key, especially with my autistic son. He is a handful and he doesn't mean to be. He just doesn't understand how to cope with frustration yet when his toys aren't doing what he wants. And my 3 y/o is a bit too touchy and rough for his liking. 
My parents (dad especially) had no patience when I was a kid. So the main reason I am able to stay calm, collected, and patient is because of that. I remember my dad flipping shit over everything. I don't want to be like that for my children. I have clinical depression and anxiety and a lot of that, I contribute to my parents (especially dad) being impatient and placing too high of expectations on me and them favoring my little sister (who constantly disobeyed and hardly got in trouble.)
And it also helps me stay calm is knowing how lucky I am to have a husband who can harbor the burden of being a parent who works constantly and hardly has time with the kids. They can test my patience at times, but I would rather that then hardly ever see them, as my husband does. 
It has also helped my patience that my 2 y/o is autistic. He is more frustrating than my other children, but he doesn't understand as much. If I'm constantly stressing, losing my patience, and/or being angry it is only going to dampen his development. He especially needs me to be calm and patient. And I had severe ppd for a year after he was born. So the guilt of thinking I caused his autism (realistically I know I didn't but mom guilt, y'know) has helped me even more to always remain patient and calm.

Answer

After a quick search on Google, since I've never heard of a default parent lol! I am 110% the default parent, anything and everything with the kids falls on me. I am a stay at home mom and I think that's most of the reasoning for it in our family.. it's hard and I do get frustrated at times but in this moments I try to ask my partner for help.

Answer

Yes I am. The kids always automatically address me. I just tell them that they have a dad they can ask for help as well.

Answer

First let me just say how ticked off I am for the mothers who gotta deal with this that are with the bio dad of their baby. 
Technically yes I am the “default parent” because my boyfriend isn’t the biological father and doesn’t live with us. (my bd aint shit and dipped out at the beginning). My boyfriend works and I’m on unemployment, but the best thing about him is that even though he has a psychically demanding job he comes and spends his free time at my house WITH ME taking care of my son. He gets up during the night, he feeds him, changes him, he plays with him and is happy to do so. That shit screams “father material” to me. 
You deserve better, like i would be asking myself do you have a partner who’s supposed to be with you going 50/50 together or do you just got a dead beat baby daddy who fucks you once a week and just holds your kid for 10 minutes a day and calls it parenting 🙃 (no disrespect towards you mama cause you’re killin it. But seriously your man needs to step up. I’d be pissed.)

Answer

Yep. 100%

Answer

I’m not a parent so it doesn’t affect me

Are you the default parent?

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