Welcome to 💋Life Of Lauryn: Season One💋.

Per my new beginnings... everything in my life has been reset as much as possible. There’s a guy. I swear omg. I can’t stop thinking about him and I barely seen his face but what I saw was soooo good. My body wants him and I hate myself for it. He’s consuming all my thoughts. The good ones, the funny ones... he gave me sex ones... not like he told me but I want it from him so I’ve created them in my mind about him but if he didn’t exist I wouldn’t have them.

I’m gonna hate myself for this next line but I love him 🤣🤣😂😂🙈. Like for the happiness and conversation he gave me. Since I can receive love. Everything is temporary. So might as well use the love I have while I can while I can feel it 💕 Is say it’s fake love but it’s not. You don’t have to be in love to love someone. Love is free. So I’m giving it to me in the form of him. And loving him for existing and making me happy.

I wonder what it’s like to lay with him. Talk to him in person or hear his voice. I wonder what he sounds like? Am I so high I forgot if I heard him or not? I wanna feel him. I keep feeling it in my stomach everytime I think about it. He’s probably a good kisser. I don’t kiss but his lips beautiful. I want to meet him so bad and touch his belly button lol.

I doubt men like him keep women like me. I love me but I’m not like the girls who get kept. Idk why... perhaps it’s not meant for me.