3rd baby weight gain

Shay🤰💜✌

Im the heaviest ive ever been in my life. i was 130 when I got prego with my first and 198 at birth I was 160 when I got prego with my second and 198 at birth I gained alot of weight after birth of my second and was 190 when I got prego with this baby i am 200lbs now and not even half way done with this pregnacy. I have never weighed this much in my life and it honestly makes me really sad. Anyone else struggle with weight gain emotionally?