I feel like a crazy person starting to worry about this so early, but my L&D with my daughter was kind of traumatic.

I went from “was that a contraction?” to 8cm in 3 hours. There was no time for an epidural (which i really really wanted), and the maternity ward was full.

I ended up delivering naturally while flat on my back in a freezing operating room. I tore pretty badly because my body didn’t have time to prepare, and it was incredibly painful (hyper-efficient contractions = extremely painful contractions). It was less than 4 hours from when i started timing my contractions to when i delivered her.

It didn’t feel magical or natural. It felt abrupt and traumatic. It felt unnatural to not be able to be in any position except flat on my back, i had to push when i didn’t feel the urge to, and they wouldn’t let me pee beforehand, so i ended up peeing all over the operating table and giving birth in a puddle of my own urine.

And since I’ve had one precipitous labor, I’ll probably have another.

Realizing now that i need to talk to my therapist about this 🤦🏼‍♀️.