Gender Disappointment 😔

Alright..... I know I will probably get some hate for this. I am experiencing gender disappointment and I am mad at myself for feeling this way. I am SO happy to be having our 2nd boy. But this is very likely our last baby and it just makes me really sad knowing I’ll never get to experience having a little girl. At first I was fine with whatever gender, and then all of our family kept pushing for girl and I feel like I couldn’t give everyone what they wanted-including my husband (who is excited for a 2nd boy). I know the gender is determined by dad....but I feel like I let everyone down. I just feel sad. Ive cried about it and I’m not proud of that. I know there are many women trying to conceive. I just don’t know how to shake this feeling and get more excited. For those of you that this has happened to, how long did it last? I am happy and thankful for this baby, the sadness is just taking over all the other emotions. I don’t feel happiness/excitement 😞

If you don’t have anything nice to say please refrain from commenting. I already know I should be grateful and I am. Just having a hard time controlling my thoughts.