planned Ttc with friend! surrogacy but not giving baby up.

Hi ladies.

So this is a true story and my life so please read and be nice.

Im so certain that it's what I want then I hit a day like today and Im soo uncertain.

I have a friend he's older then me and bisexual. Yearning to be a father, biologicaly.

He's an amazing guy and brilliant with children. financialy stable and he was adopted at 3 weeks old. Hence his yearn to be biological.

He thinks the way I do and believe that nature and nurturing children right is good parenting skills. I already have 1 child 8 yr old son had him when I was 19. His dad cheated. lied and broke me bad. I'm over him now after 6 yrs.

I'm working and have a good job.

I guess I'm just thinking, can I do really this! For sure, Baby would be loved and nurtured, and will be happy as my son has always been. But will I be happy! No SO no companionship, cuddles and assurance.!

What do u think?

Please no judging or harshness as I believe that what I'm doing is a selfless and completely kind act.