I’m not a poet, I’ve never written one before, but it just came spilling out.

I needed a place to put this, so that it exists somewhere other than my head.

I’ve lost too many and I feel like my diabetes will never let me have a successful pregnancy.

Tomb

I stood in the sea and prayed

Eyes closed

Palms outstretched

Broken heart wide open

Death arrived in his summer home

And ran his cold hands along the familiar walls

Cleared the cobwebs, dusted the furniture

Fixed himself a cup of tea and sat down to wait

He heard the call

Hope that sings like joyous bells on the breeze

He is never late

His punctuality is mercy in disguise

It’s been 4 years since his last holiday by the sea

Since the doors were sealed and hidden away

4 years since his invitation had been revoked

No matter how loud I screamed

How long I cried for help

How hard I threw myself at the door

Until my fingers were bloody and numb

My body bruised and broken

And begged him to let you stay

Or at least to let me go with you

For I had wished for you

I hoped for you

I changed for you

I fought for you

For so very long

But he was waiting for you too

He knew you were his

Long before I had hoped you were mine

And he laid you amongst your brothers and sisters

With the greatest of care

In the cold

In the dark

And he took your hand before I could

And he sang you to sleep

And your blanket became a shroud

And he buried you before I even knew your face

For nothing grows inside a tomb

Only silence