Any tips? We have a biter!

Question

Sooo i just feel horrible, our son is biting other kids at daycare! Has anyone else experienced this? He is our one and only baby so I’m just at a lost on what to do. We talk to him about it and not raise our voices or anything. We never bite him back (parents tell me too but We are not going to do that). He has also hits sometimes too. The hitting is more when he is upset and frustrated. He does not talk much (but it is getting better). I feel so bad for the kids and parents who he bites. Does anyone know how long this phase lasts? I think he might be starting to get his 2 year old molars, but not feeling anything popping through. Any advice or tricks is greatly appreciated!!

Answer

Thank you guys for the reassurance and help! Makes me feel better that I am not the only going through this! I hope and pray it is not a long phase!

Answer

I was literally logging on to post and ask for advice on my daughter,  going through the same issue. She can't communicate really well yet and she's in a Montessori school so some older kids which I think makes her frustrated at times. I'm really frustrated because I really need the teachers to give me more context so we can figure out why ?

Answer

I was a daycare teacher of a 2 year old classroom for a couple of years and this is common. Bitters are still good kiddos. They are usually doing it out of frustration. So the language is huge to help him figure out what it is he wants. Also to find the trigger. If he is bitting to get a toy for instance ask the teacher to help occupancy him in play to help him in those scenarios. Also having ready available teething toys that are cold and or even a cold washcloth he can chew on might be really helpful. I never suggest bitting back kids don't understand that concept that little. Best wishes.

Answer

My first was a biter. He would bite when happy, mad, sad, frustrated, playing. He just bit when he was having any of these emotional changes. Talk to your daycare and ask if they have plan set up for him at daycare. My doctor recommended not ever saying the word bite and ignoring the behavior. An example, when he went to bite me I would turn my body away and ignore. I would bang around and go back to doing what we were doing. It helped but my doctor also said it’s a natural phase and he would grow out of it. 
My daycare was terrible about it and made it worse. They had lots of issues with workers when we were there. I would say as long as you and daycare and working together and communicating well, your little one will grow out of it eventually. 
I’m sorry you have to go through this and I know how it’s hard to be that parent.

Answer

My first was a biter at daycare. It’s normal, so many kids go through this, but I know it really sucks to be the parent of the biter.
Mine didn’t bite at home which made it harder, because I couldn’t really punish him 6 hours later for biting a kid that morning. But we talked about it a lot, especially when I was getting him out of the car for drop off and I’d remind him not to bite the kid he always bit. His daycare always told me so I’d ask when he got home every day if he bit the kid and praise him if he didn’t and sternly remind him that really hurt his friend and was a mean thing to do when he did. At daycare they tried to keep them separated, but that was hard since they were actually good friends. If they couldn’t sit right next to my biter then they put him in the playpen (only on days he already bit the kid and explained why).
It was a long, hard, exhausting process. It took him about a month to stop biting that poor kid. And tbh in the end it was probably more the fact that the other kid bit him HARD that made him stop.

Any tips? We have a biter!

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