Separation, custody battles, financial battles and a crappy grandpa

I need to rant and get this off my chest because I’m stressed out, overwhelmed and upset with this whole situation. In September 2017 my daughters father and I bought a house, we had it checked over and they said all was good. We move in and find out the main bathroom bathtub plumbing was messed up and it needed to be replaced, the whole bathroom needed to be gutted right down to the studs and rebuilt as the water damage caused mould and the structure was wake from the wood being wet. My grandpa whom I met 6 years ago offered to cover the cost and we pay it back whenever, he is definitely on the wealthier side and some may consider him rich. I denied it, talked it over with my daughters father and he said absolutely not as it always ends bad when you borrow money but it was a nice gesture. He continued to persistently offer this money and eventually I said fine but this is a deal between you and me as my daughters father isn’t fond of the idea and would rather not owe anyone money even if we don’t need to jump on it and pay him back right away, he just didn’t want to do it and would rather do it pay check to pay check. I was all for having my bathroom back within weeks since we could just pay for the materials we needed all at once and not wait for each pay check to come in to get little bits here and there. He gave us $3200. January 2018 rolled around and I started paying him a set amount weekly, I fell pregnant with my daughter and ended up going off work due to medical reasons so I had lost my income and didn’t want to use my mat leave until she was actually born so the payments stopped for a bit. I never got back to work but I still paid him here and there, whatever I could. I’d make stuff and sell it on marketplace for a little extra cash to do this. October 2020 rolled around, we put our house up for sale because we couldn’t keep up with the bills on our home, and with this pandemic finding work was easy but finding affordable childcare just was not. Our house insurance came out every month on the 17th but I guess it changed when it renewed from the year and the date to be paid was the 11th now. The email confirming this was set to my daughters fathers email, both of ours were on file but I never received it. I paid it on the 17th and the next day I received a letter stating the immediate termination on the house insurance due to no payment received. I’ve always paid my bills on time and never had a problem so I called them explained the situation and told them our house is up for sale, we only need this month to sell our home, that I paid it but on the wrong date as there was a mix up in the email and my partner doesn’t go on his often. They were horrible to me, just so rude. I was in tears because the lady said I couldn’t legally sell my home without insurance and the only way they’d reactive it if I were to pay for a year up front and I had to do it via credit card then be reimbursed once I sold the home. I didnt have a credit card at the time and broke down and called my grandpa up, explained the situation and even had them add him into the call to explain it all to my grandpa. All was good, our home sold and it turned into a nasty separation right quick, custody battle, the sale of our home money as my daughters father said I shouldn’t be entitled to any money as I was not working although I put in on the down payment and paid the bills and he received the child tax credit monthly to put towards the bills. I had to find an apartment, find a job, childcare, furnishing as I didn’t get a single thing from the house. I took 20% of the money and put it down on 6 months of rent, used some for a bed and couch and then dinnerware, miscellaneous stuff that I needed etc. I bought everything used and cheap to save money, my grandpas wife started making comments on how my place and stuff i have isn’t good enough for my daughter and that she deserves to live in a nice house with beautiful furnishings but to me, that didn’t matter because a happy home is a good home, nice couch and objects have no bearing on it and it made me feel bad that I can’t provide all the nicest things. In my defence I had come out of a relationship with no job, money, a place to live or even a plan on how to get everything done in the few weeks I had to do it. I was such a cluster fuck, I got my apartment before finding a job, I got a job before finding childcare. I did everything backwards because I just needed to get it done. December2020/January2021 I gave him 4000k, I hadn’t heard from him since I left my daughters father, only his wife here and there making nasty remarks about me and putting me down for literally everything. He told my mom I owe him 6k more and was going on about it.. she told me confused thinking I had paid him which I did. He eventually messaged me demanding this money, I told him he was wrong and needed to recalculate that he gave me $3200 then $2000 for the insurance but 90% was put back on his card. That $4000 was more then what I owed as I paid for a year every week in 2018. but gave it to him as a thank you for helping. I have so much going on, all these adjustments being a single mom juggling work and everyday life, all the shit with separating and then custody fights as one day he wants her and demands her despite if she’s at daycare, with my mom, we have plans and if he doesn’t get his way all hell breaks loose. I’ll offer him the next day on his terms for how long, what time he wants to pick her up etc as I want her to see her dad and then he will be a no show, it’s a whole game and a shit load of stress. My lawyer says to not withhold her without reason (ie: he can’t demand the day of when she’s already at daycare and I’ve prepaid for the day as I pay each time she goes) but if he wants her the next day to let him have her so until then, it’ll be rocky. Anyways, with all this going on I said fuck it and told my grandpa whatever, I’ll give you the money but when I do my taxes this month because I don’t have anything right now. He said ok, I haven’t heard since. I get a call at work the other day and it’s my daughters father loosing it, saying my grandpas freaking on him, demanding 6k, threatening if he doesn’t pay up and it was just a huge blow out, unnecessary stress. I messaged my grandpa and told him pretty much that I was disappointed he’d go behind my back and do exactly what I asked him not to as this transaction was between him and I, I made it clear before that my daughters father wanted no part in it. That he blindsided me and that I’m upset. That I have all this chaos going on and he’s just adding to it as I already said he’d get his money just in a few weeks and that I’ll call the bank and see if they will loan me that money now and he can have it then delete my number from that point forward. He didn’t even respond and is going about his days unbothered meanwhile he just blew shit up for me, caused me even more stress, causing this separation even more fighting as this is one thing my daughters father just didn’t agree with or want me doing and despite that I did it anyways and we had fought about it many times before and here we are fighting about it still. My grandpas gone and denied me paying him anything back, lied about how much he gave me, lied about the house insurance going back on his credit card so here I am going through statements so show proof of the amounts, dates and to whom the transfers went to, the statement of deposit of the bathroom money, have to call the insurance and get proof of payment reimbursement to his card and I can’t help it feel resentful about all this.