Was I in the wrong?

Question

So yesterday was my bridal shower in the morning and bachelorette party afterwards into the night and overnight. There were so many people who attended and it was just a very busy and overwhelming time but also so much fun. My mother-in-law wasn't able to attend as she had to work but had sent a gift for me to open there. I picked the gift up from her and told her thank you. And today my fiance texts me and says that she is hurt because I never texted her thank you yesterday after the bridal shower. 
I didn't want to be rude to my guests yesterday so I wasn't even on my phone or checking it or anything. I was socializing with the guests who were there. And then after the shower, my bridesmaids and I loaded the gifts into my car, dropped them off at my house, then went to a different town an hour away for my bachelorette party. I really wasn't on my phone at all because I was enjoying my time with the girls since they were there celebrating me. 
So I just felt weird that she was upset cause I didn't text her. Am I in the wrong for not texting my mother-in-law thank you? Like should I have? I feel like she is making this about her and not thinking about me and what I was doing? It wasn't like I was sitting at home afterwards and never texted her.

Answer

You said thank you when you picked up the gift. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ mil’s! 🤣

Answer

Prepare yourself now. This is how she will likely react to many things. I’ve been married for 7 years and I literally thought I was reading my own bridal experience. It’s hard, and we do make it work. It isn’t always pretty though. So, take lots of deep breaths and temper your expectations. I have so many little stories like this about my MIL and it isn’t any easier when you add children. However, she’s the mother to my hubby and the grandma to my child so I work really hard to maintain a baseline relationship to foster family functionality. I am sharp tongued and have to remind myself not to lash out, but respectfully articulated my side of things. It’s no secret we are a work in progress and for the most part the rest of the family is aware and respectful.
Currently she isn’t speaking to me because I won’t let her buy material things for my child (because she has 25 pairs of shoes, two closets full of clothes, etc. All hand-me-downs, in great condition, from a cousin only 1 year older). Also, I don’t call her after my child’s doctor appointment to check in with her. She does get to watch her every other Friday, because she shares with my mom. And we have an open door policy and my MIL is welcome to be with her only grand baby as much as we can make happen. But it’s still not good enough and she called to tell me about how disappointed she is for two hours. Yes, breathe and temper your expectations. I am 7 years in and not surprised at all.
It has been like this the entire time I’ve been married! She was not at all like this while dating, so I was initially shocked. Then it was our first holidays, birthdays, etc. I was so hurt and so pissed. And then I realized what you already touched on. It’s not about me, it’s about her. And sadly you have no control over her. Just you. Man I wish I would have been able to swallow that sooner. 
Also, your SO’s way of reacting to the MIL will greatly impact the situation, so hopefully he is a good man ready to mediate. Mine, not so much. Good man-not a good mediator. Took along time for him to take the rose colored glasses off and see his mom for an individual and not his “mommy”.
Hopefully, I am sooooo wrong!!! But if I am not, I hope that this helps:)

Answer

I would have called the next day and say thank you!

Answer

If it was me, I probably would have texted her on that day telling her how I missed she wasn't there (but understood) and thanked her for the gift again.  I probably also would have asked her if she wanted to have lunch or something so I could fill her in, show her pictures, and let her know what we had gotten for gifts.  
But my underlying question was why couldn't she have asked off from work for that day?  Didn't she know far enough in advance??

Answer

Why would she do that unless she wants to badmouth you to her son! Girl, you didnt do anything wrong as you already thanked her. Just call her and say sorry you have been really busy with your party and say thank you AGAIN😊

Answer

And thats how it all started🤣🤣(after 2 yrs) you will update us gal

Answer

She's being kinda petty. You did thank her when you picked up the gift and then the following day. Etiquette dictates that you have months to give your thanks and still fall within the guidelines of good taste. 
She needs to relax.

Answer

I can see it from both sides. I dont believe you are in the wrong especially if you showed your fiance that you truly wernt on your phone. I can see from her side depending on the gift and she probably feels bad she couldnt be there.  If her son means a lit to him, so do you.  How you appreciate that is major in their eyes. I personally would have had a brunch with just her and opened the gift or have opened the gift when she gave it to you.

Was I in the wrong?

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