So my husband and I have been married for about a year and half. In the beginning, he was great to my kids and clearly put up a front that he liked them. Well my husband has serious anger issues and I know I should have never married him and left him a long time ago. He’s narcissistic, verbally and emotionally abusive. He wants a divorce after any little argument and I literally cannot have an opinion different than his.

Well, he got upset the other day because our newborn was falling asleep but sort of cranky. My husband proceeds to rub his chest and it seemed like it was agitating our son so I said it seemed like he didn’t like it. Well he got SO pissed off. He feels that if I ever say ANYTHING to him, I’m trying to control him. Well this opened up the whole can of worms again about him wanting a divorce, calls me a bitch and says if I don’t divorce him I’m weak.

I bawl my eyes out for two days until finally I come to terms that my kids deserve better. He starts trying to talk to me and telling me he’s sorry and he loves me, etc doesn’t want to be without me... same ol’ shit. Then he tells me the problem isn’t me, it’s actually my kids. He basically can’t deal with them and doesn’t have patience for them. They “don’t listen to me”, “don’t respect me”, are “delinquents”, “shitty ass kids”, misfits, slobs, and idk what else he has said. My kids are annoying, but are actually decent kids. I have a 6 year old who has an attitude and a 9 year old who I feel has some sort of ADHD. So it can get loud but nothing crazy like disrespectful etc.

Then He says that he didn’t “realize” this life wasn’t for him and doesn’t want to do it. He’s so back and forth, one minute he wants to be with me and then the next minute he doesn’t because of my kids. What’s wrong with him? I know I can’t diagnose him but I truly feel he has some type of multiple personality disorder, NPD, or bipolar.

This shouldn’t even be a question but would it be stupid to move out, stay married, but try to work on the relationship from a distance? I know my kids are going to outgrow their phase and not be as hyper and loud.... but then I tell myself wtf fuck this guy. I’m just so so so so so so torn. I love him so much. I know you might think what’s there to love, but that 90% of the time is just so amazing. It sucks so bad.