My husband doesn’t believe in foreplay?

My now-husband and I had a conversation about my waning desire for sex (work/family stress, fertility treatments), but it is mostly attributed to the focus on me. I brought this up and he became frustrated with having to “warm up the engine” before diving right in. He believes that kissing is substantial foreplay as it is all it takes for him to get to be where he needs to be. When I brought this up he mentioned that he doesn’t want to get “his hands messy” and doesn’t like performing oral sex. He used to make more of an effort, but now has completely lost interest in making an effort. Now I can’t even masturbate to get myself there as he tends to arrive at his destination rather quickly these days. I’m not sure what to do or any other way that I can convince him that I need more to get value from sex for it to be worth it for me. I feel like I have had the conversation with him so many times and he will try for a minute before it’s like he forgets and everything snaps back to normal..