I haven't felt like a man in over a year..

I've made a post about my rape but something I never shared with my wife is I do not feel like a man anymore. I haven't in over a year. When I was raped in the bathroom that guy took everything from me including my manhood. I was a man, a husband. Now I don't feel like a man. And it seems like my wife has become my mom instead of my wife. She acts so careful of what she says around me. Has had to hold me after a nightmare or flash back. Ever since my rape I've wet the bed a bit. Sometimes it's only once a week. Other times it's everyday that week and my wife nudges me awake and tells me to take a shower while she changes the sheets like I'm a CHILD! She must be so embarrassed of her. I can't have sex with her rn because of my trauma. She has to watch me cry like a child. She has seen me wet the bed like a 4 year old... She doesn't have a man... I'm no longer a man...

Edit: I have been seeing a therapist.. It's helped a little but not so much with me feeling like less of a man...